***Trigger Warning – mentions grooming as it pertains to sexual abuse of a child/teenager
The Master Predator
The martial arts instructor was a master predator. He knew how to play his game well. He was always ready to make a play, and he aimed to win. I seriously doubt that I was his only target, and I seriously doubt that he did not attempt to seduce the older woman who seemed to make googly eyes at him in martial arts class either. I believe he sought out whoever he could find to fulfill his sadistic needs. Looking back, this man was a sociopath.
The Link
At some point during the time that my siblings and me were in the instructor’s class, my dad ran into a financial problem. He somehow got behind in making payments to the instructor. Instead of withdrawing us from the class, my dad and the instructor came up with a plan to keep us there so that our learning could continue.
I would think that this plan was confidential, but it was not. I think as part of the instructor’s plan to target me, he made sure that his youngest sister, who was also a student in the class, befriended me. Even as a friend, I thought this girl knew personal things about students in the class that she should not have known.
I know the instructor was very involved with his family, but the martial arts studio was his business. I never understood the reasoning for his younger sister, a girl three grades behind me, needing to know that my father could not keep up with payments. It was a bit embarrassing for me to know that someone else knew this in class even if it were the instructor’s sister.
Strangely, this was a link, among many other things, that the instructor seemed to nonchalantly hold over my head against me. My father could not pay, but the instructor was willing to keep my siblings and me in the class. It was the first “check” within my spirit that this man was not all that he presented himself to be, but by this point, I was already conflicted about my like of him.
The instructor wanted me to feel that I was indebted to him … that I should be grateful for the opportunity to remain in his class when he could have simply rejected a plan with my father. Yet, this instructor was a predator. He had other plans. He had a different agenda, and his agenda was me.
Somewhere within my spirit I was intuitively aware, but I was innocently still naïve despite my previously now very deeply buried trauma of sexual assault. I had not learned that predators were not just preteen or teenaged boys hellbent on destroying a little girl, but predators were also adult men hellbent on destroying the remaining innocence of a young teen girl.
The instructor might have normally denied members of the class a payment plan, but I assume that he wanted to come across as compassionate and understanding. However, this was all a part of the ruse of his plan. He needed to keep me in the plan to remain the predator in my life. He had a goal to fulfill. So once he knew that he certainly had me in his grip, he proceeded with his plan in full effect.
I was totally not ready for what was about to hit me. It was a very confusing time, but even in my confusion, I knew that I did not want to be in the grasps of a predator.
Stay tuned for what happens next about The Instructor.
My Voice Unchained 