Time is one of the most valuable resources we have, and yet manipulators are notorious for ignoring it. When they bulldoze past your limits, it’s not just about getting what they want. It’s about control. By disregarding your boundaries, they’re essentially saying: Your time doesn’t matter. Only mine does.
And here’s the kicker: If you don’t enforce your boundaries, they’ll continue to test, push, and override them until your schedule – and your peace of mind – belongs to them.
The Lesson from My Work
Part of my job involves scheduling appointments for clients. We have an appointment app that allows customers to schedule themselves, but I learned early on that if I left my calendar wide open, clients would consume every available slot. That left me with no time to complete the essential behind-the-scenes work those appointments require.
So I began protecting my schedule – padding it intentionally to guard work time. Still, some clients didn’t respect those limits. Instead, they pushed and shoved their way into my day as if I existed only to meet their demands.
One client in particular, a man hiding behind the veil of being an ordained minister, completely lost control when he couldn’t get the exact appointment he wanted. He pitched a tantrum during a virtual meeting – literally yelling into my ear. I offered him two clear options, but he didn’t want to hear it. He wanted his way, regardless of the reality of my booked schedule.
This wasn’t an isolated incident. He had once physically barged into my office, demanding to be seen, and I had given in simply because I had a small window between appointments. His sense of entitlement was staggering – he didn’t care about my other clients or my time. His only concern was himself.
And then came another gentleman, who also bulldozed his way into my calendar after missing his own scheduled appointment. Two grown men throwing tantrums because they couldn’t bend time to their will.
What I noticed most was the pattern: When people feel entitled, they will throw fits, rant, manipulate, or even physically intrude if it means forcing you to bend. Their inability to regulate their emotions becomes a weapon against your boundaries.
The Shift
But here’s what changed everything: I stopped bending. I documented what happened, enforced reschedules, and laid down firm conditions: Respect the appointment times given or be rescheduled again. Period.
And you know what? Their embarrassment and shame after the fact didn’t move me anymore. Their tantrums no longer pulled me into the chaos. I realized that manipulators thrive on breaking boundaries because it makes them feel powerful – but their feelings are not my responsibility to manage.
The Takeaway
Manipulators ignore your time boundaries because they want control. They test whether you’ll fold when pushed, and if you do, they’ll keep pushing. The antidote is clear, calm consistency. Enforce your boundaries without apology.
Because here’s the truth: Your time is just as valuable as anyone else’s. And if you don’t protect it, someone else will gladly waste it.
My time has value. I will not shrink my boundaries to fit someone else’s demands.
My Voice Unchained 